In today’s society women are taught to love themselves above all else. It’s preached by many that you can’t be a good mother unless you make YOU time and you are FAILING at being a good parent if you don’t tend to your child’s every need. Leave the dishes and clutter, order grocery pickup, enjoy your children while they are young, and lets not forget posting online all about our daily struggles so others can relate.
Now I can get caught up in this mindset just as easily as any woman today, but I try really hard to pull myself out of this worm hole. When you hear the older generation say, “Times have changed. It’s just not like it used to be”, they aren’t joking. Times have changed and although some ways maybe for the better I question if we are doing this mom thing right.
Three kids is HARD. That’s not to say that just one isn’t, but dang three is hard. Deciding to cut back to part time while my kids are young was one of the best decisions I could have made. Despite the hit it took on our bank account, best decision. Unfortunately though even with this extra night a week at home, I continue to struggle with feeling as if I have enough time to do it all.
Where am I going with this? So the internet is confusing. I read blogs and watch videos where moms preach to not worry so much about a clean house, but unfortunately that’s not how my mind works. I need a clean house to be a good mom. My mind doesn’t function well when there’s clutter surrounding it.
Sure there are days when I let the laundry pile up mile high don’t get me wrong. There are also days though that I tell my kids to leave me the heck alone so I can get some work done. Go dig a hole or make up a song and sing it to the cats. Heck that’s the crap I used to do when I was a kid! Does that make me a bad mom? You know what? I don’t care.
Kids have to learn to self play. Kids have to learn that they are not the center of the universe. My husband and I show them plenty of love. We provide them with a warm home, food, and the daily essentials for a comfortable life. It is not however my responsibility to entertain them 24/7. Learn to be bored. Just wait till you have a full time job kid and you watch that clock tick. You’ll realize then you may not have been as bored as you thought you were.
Back to the self love issue. I love all the self love us women provide each other with today! It’s great. BUT let’s not forget that we are never alone with our own thoughts and struggles. Our man Jesus is right by our side. Always.
If you want to be the mom who leaves the mess and gets down on the floor to play with your kids. Do it. If you want to be the mom who tells your kids to go make an imaginary friend in the backyard while you get your floors mopped and closet color coordinated. Do it.
No matter which way of parenting you prefer, at the end of the day remember what’s most important. Living a life that’s pleasing to that big man looking out for us. He takes away all the guilt, worries, and frustration that come with the title of motherhood. Ask HIM to transform your life. Sometimes the best advice you will ever get is closer than you think.
I promise he won’t let you down.
Modern Day Mom 101